"how lucky am i to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard." -a.a. milne
i know i've mentioned that november is one of my favorite months... which is also rather ironic because it is a month that represents memories of loss for me (and for rob too for that matter...).
so why or how can it still be one of my favorite months?... it's all about perspective.
i (& we) have been and remain fortunate to have so many treasured people in our lives.
it is a month that we each tragically lost our best friends... i was in high school when i lost Casey, rob's loss was almost 6 years ago.
it is the month of rob's grandfather's birthday, who we said goodbye to 5 1/2 years ago.
this month is also when our first baby would've been due.
my outlook. you can dwell on the sad and hold on to that or you can be thankful for what you had and hold on to the amazing memories. we have chosen the later.
so occasionally when i think of november, it is with a heavy heart... but always a thankful one.
i'm thankful that i had a friend like Casey in high school. we met because our boyfriends at the time were best friends. those relationships didn't last long, like most high school relationships... but our friendship lasted. the split second i found out about her car accident, my life changed forever. i was never the same.
there is a much longer, deeper, sad, yet amazing story surrounding our friendship and her amazing life...but i'll save that for another time. she's one of those people in my life. you know the ones that when someone asks you to name a few people who impacted or changed your life... she's definitely high on that list.
i know Rob feels very similar about his friendship with Brian. i absolutely LOVE hearing stories of his memories of their time growing up together. i only had the privilege of meeting him and hanging out with him a few times, but even in those small glimpses of their friendship... they were brothers.
there is just something that impacts you so deeply to have that close of a friendship and then they're gone.
we all miss rob's Grandpa Len so often. even though i only knew him for a few years and really only real well for a few months, it sure would be nice to be able to sit down and play a game of pinochle with him and rob again or take another trip to valley view with him and Grandma Nina! & i know there isn't a second that goes by that Grandma Nina doesn't miss him.
only God knows how much our sweet little angel impacted our lives in the quick 9 weeks we spent hoping, dreaming and planning for his/her future. we have been so blessed to love two babies so deeply... one we fit a lifetime full of love into 9 weeks, which we can't help but be thankful for. that sweet little soul now lives... lives and walks the streets of heaven with our heavenly father.
so basically today, i am thankful for the perspective of loss that i have been given; that even though there are voids in my heart... i'm thankful for the people who left them there. even though each of their times here were way too short, they were all special to us. so blessed to have had them in our lives! ♥